Filed under: Commitment
My heart skipped a beat as she walked into the room. I could not take my eyes off of her. There seemed to be a knowing that went beyond words. My heart opened and the feeling that began to move through my body was warm and wonderful. I want to meet her. It felt as if I had known her from before and yet I knew we had never met. What should I do, I wondered? My stomach was feeling like I was swaying on turbulent ocean waves. Should I get up and walk over to meet her?
Then, like an ice storm the fear came. What if she says no? What if I offend her? She may not find me attractive? I might be embarrassed. I will look like a fool if she already is in a relationship. The other people in the coffee shop might laugh at me?
How many of you can relate to the following experience? Some of you may have felt that way before in other scenarios. The fearful feeling tends to sneak up on us. It can show up in many different ways.
Perhaps you are in a meeting and you know the solution to the problem. Nobody else can see the solution because they are stuck in stinking thinking and trying to be right about the “way it is”. As life and business leaders we must learn to abate the sinking “icey” feeling and speak our truth. If we don’t speak our truth or reach out our hand to life…it can pass us by quickly and decisively. Then, we can look back on our years of life with a sense of complacency.
Consider that in most of those situations, the moment will never be the same again. Those moments come and go and it requires courage to “stand” up for our beliefs or to say yes to an intuitive feeling. Many times feeling like a coward can help? What you say? Most people think cowardice is a bad thing. No not really, because most people pretend to have it all together. They are just cowards in disguise. Those people are just as afraid as the next person. The difference is they don’t want to look bad, because they are so invested in looking good. This requires tremendous false energy. It is a waste of creativity.
The person that is cowardly…like the lion in the Wizard of Oz isn’t worried about looking good and will tend to try more things than the person holding on to some false identity. Think about it? Kids are great at speaking out…or trying new things. They are not generally worried about doing it right. They learn that latter from the adults.
I promise you the courage will come forward for you. As a coach, I am constantly inviting (pushing) my clients to go to the edge with their courage. We grow from these moments. We grow from the experience regardless of the outcome. We grow if we are willing to take the step. You don’t need to know the sequence of steps; only the very first one.
I have heard it said that “spirit meets us at the point of action.” I believe that to be true. It makes sense. Spirit is not stupid and why would spirit move for me while I sit on my butt.
So, I took a deep breath. I stood up and walked over to the table. I knew not what to say. I reached out my hand and spoke: “When you walked in this coffee shop, my heart opened and I saw you as the most beautiful woman I have ever seen”. My voice was steady. Suddenly, I felt light hearted and clear. I said, “I could not leave here today without at least meeting you.” She smiled and we began a conversation. It’s a good thing I was a coward on that day. If not for my cowardly lion I would not have met Leslie and we would not be engaged to be married.
This concept applies everywhere with everything we do. It applies with our kids, our business, our relationships, our money, our health, our sense of adventure. Courage is needed everywhere. Fear sucks and courage rocks.
What will you do the next time you need to find your courage?
For a lifetime of courage, go to www.clubfearless.net and join members from 15 other countries.
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This is so true. You could not have said it better. Without courage, we would never get anywhere. Because you had enough courage to approach that beautiful woman, you are now engaged. Good for you. Wouldn’t it be nice, if everyone could find the courage to do the same. How many times do we walk right pass our soulmates but are too chicken to even look at them. Everyone should learn from you.
Comment by lili dauphin July 28, 2010 @ 2:06 amLili,
thanks for posting your comment. you are right we all do it and for me…leaning into my courage has created great results and obviously meaningful thoughts. I sure do appreciate your comments. I love hearing from you
Comment by Stephen July 28, 2010 @ 9:42 am